Memories

I want a CHANGE

2008-09-08T11:22:00.003+08:00

Stuck with StarHub job for a year and 2 months. Out of a sudden, i wish to quit and get a perm job. I need a stable pay. However, it is so wrong when i need money and i m quitting now. Plus i am going to start my next semester soon. I guess it is a wrong time to change job and i shall tolerate till next mid Jan. End of my course. I shall prepare for my very last paper, take a few weeks break and get a better pay job. Hopefully everything went well. In terms of my result, school fees and job search.

Let ME be

2008-09-07T13:54:00.004+08:00

For the time being, let me remain stubborn and unrealistic. I do not wish to let go yet. I might be suffering but letting go is not a solution. I do not like the idea of it. No matter what happened or any decision i made, i will still regret. No difference. It is not about the long term or short term pain. I do not know how to see if there will be any ending to us. All i know is that i m not going to end here. If this is a story i wish for, i accept the challenge. All i wish is that u will stop pushing me away. I no longer believe what is meant to be yours will be yours. I do not want to leave everything to fate or destiny. I believe that happiness is to be fight for. Let me continue being who i m, the stubborn, persistent and believe in something incredible ME. Only after knowing u, do i discover myself and finally admitting of who i m.

等待

2008-08-28T22:38:00.005+08:00

等待的心情一点都不好受。

这是第一次没有收到任何一点消息。

我能任受多少次呢？

一直这样下去，我可以承受吗？

心里反反复复地不停想着。

My World is SHATTERED

2008-08-27T11:50:00.002+08:00

My world is shattered. I really do not know when is the right time to hold on or give up. It is so hard to stay strong. I do not know how to have faith or belief. Only fear and uncertainty filled me. I hate all the unknowing paths ahead me.

Only if i know my DESTINY.

Lost My Way

2008-08-24T11:50:00.006+08:00

渐渐的，我仿佛像迷了路似的，不知要如何在继续前进。

我非常的努力隐藏着我那柔弱的一面，表现的比较坚强。

但我已无法再继续了。

自己所选的路，我绝不后悔。

只是要怎么继续走下呢？

My life?!

2008-07-20T13:22:00.011+08:00

My life is never a simplicity to me, has seemed to become much more worse. Everything is so complicated.

Money issue. I wish for a long break, but i know i cannot afford it. Work seem to have pile up more. There are so much to file n archieve. I hate all this little mundane job. I m offered to take up sth more. I have given my reply. Wait till then, i shall know. I will accept the offer to take over my superior job for 3 mths during her maternity leave. I hope that i will be considered a semi-perm and that there will be a pay rise. If not, i wont even want to get myself into sth more stress and more workload n greater responsibility except that it is sth different from admin and that it is a good experience too. I shall wait till Nov then i shall know. For the time being, i m not gg to think abt it.

Study. A test fornightly. A lab report to be handed up fornightly. A week of 3 to 4 classes. Mon, Wed, Fri night n Sat noon. Coping. However, i m not sure how i m gg to go abt it next year when it is no longer foundation year n that it is degree. I even wish for more time to study although it is sth similiar that i have gone through in 'A's. I will need more time to study when i get to degree. I m not confident of coping n struggle with my study n work. I do not want to be worried of the money problems. I wish that i m able to loan my sch fees for degree if not i really do not how to go abt it. I dun wan to rely on anyone. I dun wan to cause anyone to worry. I dun wan to be a problem to anyone. If problem unable to resolved, i might have to dragged a year. Hopefully nope.

R/S. Anyone i know who is in a r/s surely wont be gg through what i m gg through. I m having sth totally out of the ordinary. Something that can only be seem in Drama Series. Anyone whom have heard will give that comment. Exciting? A test for our r/s? We get through all these, everything will be alright coz we will surely go through all other things that come to us in future? How long is this thing gg to prolong? Sigh. I m with a person of a v complicated family background. We have some differences like edu n age. Our r/s seem to be forbiddened. His mum whom is of the totally extreme kind(the one n only probably on this earth), should not find out abt us yet. We r always like in hide n seek. Even calling, msging, hanging out is sth so tough. My mum seem to be like against it too. I m not sure if Dad know abt it. Anyway, she tried to talk me out of it somehow. She did not understand why that i m with this person at the first place. She kept telling me to concentrate on my study. She kept asking why m i making my life so difficult. She even question if i get into this coz i m bored n lonely. Sigh. For godness sake. What the bloody hell la. Will there be a happy ending like in Drama Series? I wonder. Or this whole thing shld never be started?

Friends. So few i can turn to when i m really in need. Some that i m not v sure i can turn to. Sigh. So hard to continue being close at all time. Needing the time n consider of the expenses that i will spent. Life is hard. Hoping that i will be able to keep contact with all those that i treasure. I hope they treat me the same way too.

Hope everything to fall back into place...Hoping all problems to be solved on its own...

All n All Sum Up to a Misunderstanding

2008-05-27T12:38:00.003+08:00

Fine. Everything ended up to be a misunderstanding. Hmmm. I think i will just accept all his explanation. He has his point. The way he reacted might be just anyone normal reaction. Sigh. However he neglected my circumstances at that point of time. Maybe most guys are too insensitive and they never think too much of the consequences. Sigh.

Work has been really busy nowadays. Tired. Voiceless now. On a phone marathon last night even my throat is not comfortable. Haiz. Talk to 3 person straight. One after another. Now, i have no voice le. Rarr!!! Zzzz. Having a headache now. M i gg to get sick soon? Dun wan. Gg to have exam soon. N my workload a lot. Cannot. I must faster recover. God. Please dun let me get sick.

Another Call

2008-05-23T11:45:00.003+08:00

Yesterday night, he attempt to call and at the the very 'right' timing again. I was having lesson when i felt the vibration of my phone again. I looked at it. Well. He used his house phone to call me this time round. Smart. Sadly i had the record of his house number too.

I did thought of calling him back and shout at him. I wanted to tell him that he should be able to sense my coldness and should just leave me alone.

After i simmer down, i decided that if he ever attempt to call me again and the next time round at the right timing, i shall answer his call. We shall then sort things through. I did not want to make it sound like i was being petty and that i misunderstood all his motives and misjudged all the things he had said. Ok. I will be fair. I would give him one last chance for him to make himself clear.

This whole thing might no longer be a secret. I think it is time to reveal it to the person whom i have been keeping from. I hope that she would forgive me. Sorry for not hinting another friend advice that i should not tell her. But i was afraid that if he ever get to her, it would be best that i told her myself. I treasure her as a friend and i really did not want anything to destroy our friendship. N surely not because of him. It is totally not worth it.

I shall c how things proceed. Hope for the best.

Suddenly Worned

2008-05-21T10:46:00.008+08:00

Yesterday was a BAD day. Today is a BAD day too. It seem every this period of the month will not be my days.

A lot of things happen yesterday. Work was not that smooth.

Furthermore after work, if i was not mistaken, i finally bumped into the person whom i had not seem for 5 years and i had imagined how it would be like to ever meet him. A person was walking pass me at a very fast pace and busy talking on the phone. He looked and sound familiar. I turned and took another glance of him as the distance between us get wider. It was really unbelievable.

Nearing the end of my day, a person whom i would never want to receive any more phone call or messages called me again. It was 9.30pm and i was still having class when i felt vibration of my phone. The phone displayed the name of the person calling. What the Hell. Had i not make it very clear to him that i did not want to have anything more to do with him ever again. Is he really so insensitive or slow to realise all that? I noted his suggestion. Yet i could not help to think if he really mean it the way he made it sound or did he have a motive that his purpose n aim was only for that one thing. "Never judge a book by its cover". This phrase suit him totally. For numerous time, i was very offended by his rudeness towards me. He overdid some thing that he knew he should never intrude. I always remember the day when he said that i was just trying to sympathise him and probably that i was rolling my eyes and thinking how a idiotic fool he was. Fine. That is how he judge me. Wow. Thanks a lot man. All the things that he had done and his judgement of me made it clear that i was just a tool and he did not regard me as a friend at all. I knew it all along and i only accepted the reality when it is provened.

Today, another person totally 'make' my day in the morn. I m terribly sorry for that i have been telling u that i m alright yesterday when i m not and that i only tell u at the end of the day. I know that i m at fault and that do give u a right to be angry. However u should have at least try to make the person feel better first b4 u even go about telling that u r piss by it. U even asked me what do i treat u as. U even say that i m pushing u away. U even asked me why do i everytime keep things to myself. Rarrrrr!!! How i know?! That is me. I m who i m. I thought u know and that u understand me. Btw, it is not everytime also lo. Seriously. Sometime i find it hard to talk to u. I always feel that there are not all things i can tell u. I can be very frank at time only when i think it is ok. I m afraid that u will be affected. I m afraid that u will over-react. I m afraid that i would not get the sort of reply i wanted and i would be disappointed or be pissed like now. M i being unreasonable here? NO...

I m really v TIRED now... As if i have no enough burdens...more burdens are added on to me...

Contented

2008-05-13T11:42:00.007+08:00

I have not blogged for a month. Hahax. Life is ok. A lot of thing happen here n there. Busy. V occupied. A small little conflict with my bf. Meeting up with him once or twice a week. Gathering with colleagues for Korean buffet. Nicey. Shopping w Xiao Ting. Lots of Movies. Ironman. What Happens in Vegas. Etc. Meet up with Xin Yi.

I miss everyone. Jace. Levin. Pam. Emme. Caren. Ade. Angel5Clanz. Ex classmates. Haiz. Hope to meet up with all of them soon. Everyone seem so Busy. But it is really hard to keep in contact with everyone. Esp when we r of different cliques n lost in contact for a few years.

I m coping well with my study n work. Anyway, i m v contented with the way my life is. I like being occupied with not too much spare time. Coz i hate the emptiness feeling i will get when i have nothing to do or when i suddenly felt alone.

Maybe it is coz that i m so in Love. I m living in my own world. My world of Happiness. Hehex. Danny really added a lot of colour to my life. I m not that pessimistic like last time. Life is not that lost n lonely. At least that there is no more uncertainty like last year, so there is so much less trouble. I have someone who is alwaz there for me. He is really sweet at time. However i find him kind of insensitive at time. Haiz. I think most guys are like that de ba. Hahax. At the beginning i m really unclear n unsure about this whole thing. Thinking if it is due to a wrong reason which is why i accepted this relationship. At the same time, i even think that i m crazy coz i have so much to juggle like study, work n friend n as if i will have time for relationship. Anyway, I have a change in mind now. No matter what. I m really glad about starting this whole thing. Thinking about it, it is like making a big round n getting back to square/ original position. I mean me n him la. Ya. Anyway, I m really fortunate to have him in my life now. Bleah.

I just hope that my happiness will really last.

However, i cannot help but look back at time. I always wonder a what if. I always imagine of a different ans n ending. There r a part of me still holding on n wondering.

However i will still move on. I will cherish all that i have now. I shld be contented. I shall stop looking back. Putting the past behind me.

Moody

2008-04-16T09:57:00.003+08:00

I know that pple have their own opinion. Maybe we have talked things through. However, i still beg to differ. I wished to change ur mind concept abt that issue. I wished i can try even harder, but i know i cant change ur mind.

U make me ponder alot.

Somehow, i m easily affected by others in many ways. Bad. I m shaken v easily. Ya. I get myself bother w a lot of things. I m always so unsure of everything. That is including u. I m Sorry. Maybe i have been v frank towards, but there r still things i find it hard to tell u n i keep them to myself. Will time allow me to open up more?!

I need to get a grip of myself emotionally n mentally. Hmmm. What the diff?! Hmmm. Nvm.

STRESS!!!

Money. Study. Time. Sleep.

I need my bed. I need a break. I m v drained. I m v tired. I wished to stay on my bed n sleep till i have enough.

Zzz.

T_T

Mourn

2008-04-15T10:13:00.003+08:00

I just come across an email.

It is an OUT OF OFFICE AUTO REPLY from Thomas Yip (HOD) last week. In the mail, it was stated that he was currently overseas n would be back today (15th April).

After reading the email, sadness filled me.

Thomas went to an overseas meeting last week. On Fri (11th April), we received the shocking news that he died in his hotel room peacefully. Oh My!!!

Today, it was supposed to be the day when he would be back. Yet, it was his wake today. OUCH!!!

Everyone esp the perm staff whom have worked several years here, they have been v solemn nowadays. Today seem to be even worse. The ambience of the office was v cloudy. Everyone face was so pale. Now they did not talk that much or loud to us. We need to try hard to catch hard what they were trying to say.

Everytime when i passed his empty room, i was reminded of him. He might be the HOD, he was friendly n nice to everybody. Furthermore, he was so young. He was only 47 with only a wife n such a successful career. Y do such bad thing occur?

Sigh...Mourning...

Ah Argh Arrr ! ! !

2008-04-14T15:17:00.005+08:00

What is wrong ? ! !

1. Fact is i did not know that there is A lizard in the plastic bag. Nvm. I placed it inside my cupboard. Then i heard the sound of moving plastic bag even in the cupboard. Then i know it is not due to wind. Follow by the sound of Lizard. Eeee. I got to think of ways to get rid of it. Hope it haven climb out of the plastic bag. If not it will be in my cupboard le. I dun like the idea of it. Hope my bro will help me. Pray Hard.

2. Two more weeks. I will be having my Mid-Term Test le. I got to be v Focus. I got to put my Priority right.

3. I m cover w Bruise all over. I fall in the toliet. Ouch!!! CRY!!! Haiz. Sigh...

4. Parents so COLD. NAG. NEGLECT. Etc. No elaboration.

5. School Fees...Faint...

6. No more ONLINE SHOPPING. Too ADDICTIVE...

7. Doing some things i m not sure if RIGHT... Dun ask...Not telling...

8. I m tired. Drain. Sick almost every week. Down with cold or flu.

9. Change JOB? Wonder. Seem like i have stayed too long. Ya.

HAIZ!!! SIGH!!!

School = Sianzation

2008-03-26T09:43:00.003+08:00

Yest was my 2nd lesson at PSB academy. In the beginning, i was very unwilling to go for class. I changed my mind after i caculated that it was ard $15 for one hour of lesson. Oh My Tian la. Haiz. In the end, i convinced myself to go for class.

Only half n hour had passed, i kept my eyes glued to the clock in the hope that it would be 10 soon. Haiz. Why was time passing so slowly? Worst. My teacher, Edmund, took forever to go through one chapter. The pace of the lesson was very slow for something that was so basic like secondary school topics.

Here are the details of my first 2 class. Algebra, Factorisation, Radicals, Exponent, Fraction. Total 7 hours. He had not finished yet. Oh Mi Gosh. YAWN!!! He was not done with the first chapter leaving with one or two more section to go, sth like Linear Equation etc. Zzzzz.

I wonder how i m gg to survive the classes ahead. Yawn.

My Happiness

2008-03-25T17:24:00.004+08:00

One month has passed. As time pass by, i also start to stable. I did not think that much anymore.

At one point of time, i m still holding back n wondering if i shld get out of my barrier as i fear the consequences for falling too deep. I told one of my friend n she adviced that some people regretted after the breakup that they did not love enough n that i shld love with all my heart coz at the same time i m being unfair to him.

Ya. I allowed myself to sink deeper. I really hoped that i can trust, have faith in n rely on him.

As i m tasting the sweetness, i m fearing that all will become bubbles n suddenly vanished into thin air. Hahax. I m just fearing that all is just a dream.

Now, i will just experience everything fully. I will take whatever that come by. Hoping that this happiness will last.

School Starting

2008-03-13T13:22:00.005+08:00

This morn, i recieved an email from PSB academy. Oh My. I would be having orientation on 22nd March which is a sat from 12 to 12.30. Straight after that i would be having my first lecture from 1 to 5. I totally couldnt believe it. So fast. Fine. Every week i would have lesson 3 times a week. Either Tue, Thurs n Sat or Tue, Fri n Sat. Oh My. I hated that my whole sat was taken away with lesson from 9 to 12 n 1 to 5, leaving me with spare time at night only. Sigh...All the best to myself. Giving myself a tap at the back.

Btw, I figure out i really shldnt think that much abt what i blog yest. There isnt a need for me to find any ans. Ya. I m gg to let nature to take its course. I shld just go with the flow. Hoping everything go well.

Realise

2008-03-12T12:14:00.003+08:00

Suddenly i realised that it is very hard to love a person wholeheartedly as if it is going to be a forever.

Sigh......All my believes that i once thought that i will stick to seem have proven wrong. I have realised that the person who use to judge others' situation n thought that he/she would never make such a mistake might commit the same mistake like others. Haiz.

I m beginning to have a lot of doubts. Hope i have an ans soon. I shant drag for too long. I do not want things to reach a stage beyond salvage that someone will be hurt badly. Or at least that i need to get myself stabilise. Hope that i will not commit any mistake.

Beginning of my Happiness

2008-02-25T12:59:00.010+08:00

Finally, i have moved on. Some things that use to matter in the past arent that impt now.

U r the only one that i will treasure from now. Everything of u is so right. U always appear at the right time. U always seem to know when i think of u or sth bad happen to me. U seem to know me v well.

All along i have been holding back. I fear to admit that i like u as i thought u r not ready n that hope will end in disappointment. There is a point of time when i dun see ur presence n i started to doubt abt us.

Yet, u never give up. U keep assuring ur feeling towards me over n over again. U been trying to open my doors. U been telling me to say whatever i want. At this point of time, i finally willing to step up n sort things out with u. It take quite a lot of courage. I glad i did. After one year plus, things finally get to proceed further. Everything finally bcum clear.

Announcing a new beginning.

I know we have big differences. I know that there will be lot of obstacles. I hope that we r able to trust each other. I hope no matter what happen, nothing will stop us from gg forward.

I promise that i will speak whatever i have in mind.

I m really glad u enter my Life.

Departure

2008-02-14T13:08:00.004+08:00

Yesterday.

At the moment of departure when we hugged each other, tears filled my eyes. I reflamed myself from crying, as i promised that i would not. N at that point of time, u said that i should not cry. U really knew me very well. All that i could say was take care. At the moment u stepped into the departure hall and disappeared from my sight. I could not hold back my tears anymore. Tears flowed down my cheek.

I really hoped that i was going with u. At least u had a company. At least u did no need to face a aleinated environment alone. How i wished that my circumstances was different. Deep inside, i knew that u would be able to do it. I believed. I m really glad that we were in the same class. I m glad that we were in the same PW group. As i got to know a close friend whom i really treasure.

I knew that u had left a letter for me. I did not dare to look at it till i was on the bus on the journey back home. I read it. I was very touched. At the very last minute when u were leaving, u were still nagging at me n so worried about me. All i had in mind: GOD. Please watch over her. Please ensure that she is safe. Please take good care of her.

I would be more rational. I would be more decisive. I will. I shant let anybody to worry abt me. Tigger will be able to take good care of herself.

Distant/Changes

2008-02-13T11:49:00.003+08:00

Jace is flying off today. The next time i shall see her will be in Dec, 10 months to go. Haix. It seem quite long. I m surely gonna miss her. She is one of my closest friend whom i hang out quite often n whom i alwaz talk to when i need a listening hear. I love the days we just hang out at her house n doing nothing much. Yet departure cannot be avoided, we each need to go our seperate path one day too. I just hoped that we will remain in contact.

I fear distant. I fear changes. People will change. Distant keep people apart. When 2 pple whom haven been keep in contact for long and meet up again, a feeling of aleination seem unavoidable.

Maybe i m thinking too much. Hahax. Sigh...What a ME......

Priority

2008-02-13T11:24:00.008+08:00

I realised that it was very important for me to get my priority right now.

Ranking:

1. Study

2. Work

3. Family

4. Friends

5. Entertainment/Leisure

I got to stayed focus from now on. I got to spent less time n money on entertainment. I must not be distracted by any other external factors. I have no time. Work n study would have kept me very occupied. I must endured. If anyone can handled and coped well, same go for me too.

Some things are hard to stop thinking. Some things are hard to let go. However i would not hold on too. One day, all the things that use to matter alot will no longer be important. I shant ponder, letting time to pass n nature to take its course. It will so much easier if i m not who i m.

Love^

2008-02-11T13:39:00.000+08:00

"Is loving the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right, & finding out that you love someone right after that person has walked out of your life. Sometimes you think you're already over a person, but when you see them smile at you, you suddenly realize that you're just pretending to be over them, just to ease the pain of knowing that they will never be yours again. For some, letting go is one way of expressing how much they love a person, but for others it's holding on to that special feeling as long as possible before it fades away. Most relationships tend to fail not because of the absence of love, love is always present, it's just that one was being loved too much &the other wasn't being loved enough. We all know that the heart is the center of the body, but it beats on the left. Maybe that's the reason why the heart is not always right. most often, we fall in love with the person we think we love only to discover that for them, we are just a pass time, while the one who truly loves us remains either a friend or a stranger. So here's a piece of advice: Let go when you are hurting too much. Give up when you or the other believes love isn't enough, & move on when things are not like before. There is someone out there who will honestly love you, & only then will you know true love. "

Eventful Week

2008-02-04T11:02:00.000+08:00

Hahax. A great week. Busy. So tired now. Zzzz.
Btw, my phone is dying. Oh My Tian lax. Haiz......

Sun: Attended Li Chan's Wedding at Sentosa
Li Chan looked so gorgeous
Took lots of photos

The dinner was very filling

Mon: Took a day off n go Jace's hse
Grilled meat n asparagus
Eat for 2 whole hours
Serve net
Went to her room n looked at the clothes that she was planning to bring with her
Went to watch 27 dresses at Yishun
Awesome

Thurs: S24 Class Girls' Gathering
13 pple in total
Sad Jojo n Pamme not able to turn up
Had Billy Bomber instead of Vilage coz closed for a few days
Big Serving
So full
I ate so much
Ice-cream
Oh my Sinful

Sat: Went Causeway Point with Jace to do her shopping trip at evening
This was the first time ever she bought so much thing
We had Pastamania for dinner cum supper
Today was Melissa's B'dae party but i din go coz no one to acc me. Shall make it up

Sun: Met cousin Janet for Breakfast at CrystalJade
Also happened to see Xin Yi while waiting. LOlx.
She gave me lots of bags n clothes but few that i like n i would use
Not bad
Sad that could not meet Xiao Ting coz she got forget she was supposed to go Sentosa
NvmThere would be next time soon

A day at the Bookstore

2008-01-18T14:31:00.000+08:00

Yest after work, my colleague, Hazel accompany me to Takashimaya. I went to Watson to get my eyeliner(One Day Tatoo). After that we walked around the New Year Fair. Lots of food. We tried the egg tart n the softcake. So Nicey. The egg tart was so fresh and hot. Love it man. After eating, we went to Kinokuniya. She wanted to buy the book, Men are from Mars n Women are from Venus. Hahax. In the end, we were stucked at that section. Flipping through one book after another. She kept throwing me all the flirt, single, date, seduction books. Dots man. Diaoz. Lolx. Nvm. We came across a book that is so so Sweet. The book title was, a little book of LOVE. Sth like that la. It expressed love in different ways and manners. For example, a pic with a transparent heart shape melt in a pool of water. Oh My La. The last page was a ring. Wow. So Romantic. A good book to give a girl whom the guy would like to propose to. Hahax.

First Movie of the Year

2008-01-10T12:42:00.000+08:00

Yest night, i watched a movie with Xin Yi. The movie was Mission Sex Control. It was a comedy korean movie. Hahax. Not bad. V funny. I enjoyed it alot. From the movie, i just realised that it was true that something that u believed that u would do at that certain point of time would change eventually. One could never be sure that we would forever stick to a decision. Something would affect us and it would change our decision. That was life. Ya.

Err. Ok. What m i crapping here. Lolx. Ignore me. Hahax.

Btw, i actually had mac for lunch n for dinner cum supper. Oh My Tian la. So sinful. Such a unhealthy day. I think that i had gained back all that i had lost for skipping my dinner for the enitre last week. Haiz. Lolx. Ok la. Once in a while should be fine. Shant had fast food for the next few weeks. Hahax.

Dinner at Waraku

2008-01-09T13:35:00.000+08:00

Yesterday i had a wonderful dinner with an old friend whom shant be named coz i felt that i shouldnt even be in contact with him. Ya. A secret. Lolx.

One of friend, Hazel, had been telling that the nicest udon in Singapore was served at Waraku. Hahax. I had been wanting to try it. Finally after a long wait, i finally went there to try out. Wow. Really. I did agree with her. It was really awesome. I was very sure that i would go back there again. Hahax. Even he agreed that the ramen he had was great too. He said that the noodle was just right, not too hard and not too soft. He said he was very satisfied. Hahax.

Ok. Enough of the food.

The dinner was not that bad. If ever ask about the most awkward outing i had, this is not the worst la. Ya yup. Hehex. I think the weird part was when we were like trying to Psycho each other about what we believed about life, the cycle of disappointment, denial, acceptance, letting go and moving on part. Another weird part was when we wondered why we were even in contact and what were the reasons. Weird sia. Hahax. Actually the dinner was fine, only till the departure part. When i was about to board the train, i just said see him soon at dunno when . He replied that would we ever be seeing each other again. Errr. How would i know man and what a qns to ask. I said dunno. Then he said we should leave things as it was. I was like lots of qns mark above my head, I did not get him at all. Leave things as it was? What way? Errr. Ya. Nvm. I just said ok and left. Lolx.

What a day. What a way to end our meeting. Hmmmm. Hahax.

Reflections/Resolutions/Thank You List

2008-01-01T11:11:00.000+08:00

2008. A new year. A new start. Farewell to 2007.

Reflection:
Failure did not mean the end. It might leave an ugly mark in one's life, but it was a lesson for one to learn.
Escapism was not a solution. It only dread the situations and worsen the problems.
Thinking too much was not something good. I would control, esp all the pessimistic thoughts.
Life might not be the way i expected it to be. I will accept and move on.

Resolution:
No regrets in life.
No indecisiveness.
No pessimistic thoughts.
No large expenses on entertainment purposes.
I know very well that this year would be a tough year. I got to learn to juggle study and work at the same time. I got to learn to manage my own finances. I got to learn not to rely and to be independent. I shall face all problems myself and win the battle. I got to face up to reality. I shan't stay on in my world of fantasy dreams, darkness and impossibilities.
Lastly, i got to solve my communication problems b/w me and my parents.

My Thank You List:
A lot of things had happened, but no matter what i am really glad that they enter my life.

1.Jacelyn
I can't imagine my life without u for 10 months. I will miss u a lot, including all the nagging and midnight chats. Thanks for always being there for me and tolerating me. Sorry for all the times that i make you angry. U must take care of yourself when u went overseas and miss me lots. Oospi. Lolx. If possible, i do hoped that u can blog more often or email me more often. One thing i got to tell u is that u need not worry about me, i will be fine.

2.Levin
Firstly got to thank you for helping me up with the blog. Lolx. U are really great. I think i have made u suffer a lot. Like all those shoes incidents and the moments of cold wars we had. Glad to have u to entertain me when i am down and emo. Thanks for inviting me over to your house for dinner at times. I will remember the fun i have last year during the Sentosa n Night Safari Trips.

3.Pamela
Dunno if u will happened to read it a not, but i still gonna write. Why u always so Busy ah?!! Do let me know when u r free!!! Lolx.

4.Xin Yi
Hey yo. U r the one who give me this idea of writing out the thank you list. Lolx. Really bored and nothing to do, so i decided to type this part of the entry. Lolx. Really glad to have u around. Maybe our circumstances are quite alike in some ways which is why whatever that u go through seem to be able to be applied to me. I really learned a lot from u. Do u know u are the person i looked upon to?! I shall aim to be like u(Superwoman). Lolx. Thanks for listening to all my 'Exciting' stories. Lolx. This year, we will all be busy. Hope that we still be able to meet up once in a while to do some things together. Like KTV or movie. Lolx. Jia You o!!!

5.Angel5Clan
Wei Shan, Jia Jia, Keh Luh, Ivy. Haha. I am really glad that we are still in contacts. Thinking about it, I felt guilty that i did not turned up for most gathering the past few years. I will make up for it. I will try to turn up for such gatherings more often if possible. U guys have let me know that distant do not drift friendship apart. Friend Forever. I really treasure the memories that we once shared.

6.Adeline, Caren, Emily n Jasmine
My Family. Mummy, Jie Jie s and Ah Gong. U guys. Thanks for being around at some point of time in my life.

7.Jason
U might want to know something. Due to u, i have watched the most movies in my entire life. Hhaa. U r a really great movie companion man. Ya. Shi Fu. Thanks for teaching me to play pool. Lolx. I m quite a bad student actually. Haha. Thanks for entertaining me when i m bored at work and cheering me up when i m down. I will listen to ur advice and be a happier person de.

8.Jia Yong
Haha. Always so on when i asked u out if i did not manage to find company. U r a really fun person to be with. I really do appreciate u as a friend.

9.Pei Wen, Lay Theng, Hazel n Sheau Min
Work at StarHub wont be so much better w/o u guys. Lots of crap. Lots of fun. Craziness about horoscope. Lolx.